Billy No Mates

So I have gone from billy-no-mates to um...billy-with-mates! Hurrah. Quite a relief that I am not totally devoid of all social skills, have what some people deem ‘quality bants’ and am not a total loner. Result. 

So when I first arrived there was quite a big group who had been there all summer and were all the best of friends and weren't too interested in new people. But as they have shipped out, new people have arrived and we have created our own little family of sorts.

The NBF

So, on my 3rd day in the hostel I met a German girl called Tanja who started work with me on the following day. We hit it off pretty well, she seemed quite funny and a little strange so I knew we would get on just fine.

She looks quite Scandinavian with very blonde hair and tanned, flawless skin. She replaces her v’s with w’s saying things like ‘ah this looks like my willage’ and ‘do you like my high wis west’. Thats totes grounds for friendship right there. Over the last few weeks we have become good mates: driving to work together, grading potatoes together, smashing potatoes together, shopping together, cooking together (well she cooks and I eat), going on day missions together, flirting with backpacker boys together, watching movies together and more than anything we have done a LOT of goon drinking together. We also figured out that we have both been reading updates on the hellogiggles website each morning before work. WEIRD.

A few random facts about Tanja:
1. She must hate mornings more than anyone I have ever met, to the point where I don't even try to talk to her until we arrive at work. But whilst she HATES mornings, she is ridiculously happy for the rest of the day so it all balances outs.
2. She (like me) hates licorice.
3. She has a grandpa called *cough* 'Adolf'.
4. Her nicknames include Panda Donut, Tina or Gina Wilde.

Chav Night. Innit.

The Pot Smoking Italians

When I first arrived I was sharing a four man room with 2 Italians, Federica and Marco. Federica was vivacious and blonde, with a scattering of tattoos. Marco was tall and skinny with bloodshot eyes, a cheshire cat smile and teeth that looked like he had been sipping red wine all day. 

The most surprising thing about him was how such a big snore could come out of someone so slight. He literally sounded like an overweight trucker with a violent chest infection. The room ALWAYS smelled of weed and alcohol body fumes, which wasn't all too ideal. They left a few weeks ago and Tanja has since moved in as well as an Irish girl called Rebecca.

The Stalker

I also had a stalker on my first week. Yip. He was a German who admitted to lying about his age (red flag number 1), who invited me to go to New Zealand with him an hour after meeting him (red flag number 2), who practically kidnapped me after work one day - taking me up the hill for some sort of romantic picnic (red flag number 3), who changed my name on the board so I would be in his car on the way to work (um ring ring 'yes this is the mayor of crazy town'). I managed to get rid of him quite quickly which is a relief and he has since started preying on some poor Asian girls.

Yikes!

The Kooples

Will and Jean, Luke and Kelly, Nadia and Scott are all in their mid-twenties and from the UK or Ireland and are really lovely sorts. We sit with them during breaks at work and always join them for some drinking games on days off. Last week we played the Back to the Future drinking game where you have to drink every time McFly, Marty, Doc or Biff is said. Sounds easy right? I didn't even make it to the end of the movie. What a granny! Jokes it was actually because I was drinking for the better part of the afternoon and can't handle too much goon.

The Young Brits
These ladies are a bit younger with big hair, big make up (on saturday nights) and with pretty big personalities to match. They are all good fun, a bit wild and tend to dominate the beer pong table and music selection. In my first week one of these girls was having the fattest moan about being 19 years old. UM I AM A DECADE OLDER THAN YOU SWEETPEA. Jesus. 

The Geezer

Tom is just 22 and a big giant of a brown haired boy. He is from somewhere near Luton and sounds like such a London geezer that I can't help but have a soft spot for him. He fancies himself a bit of a charmer (which he surprisingly is), reckons he knows it all and loves a bit of a gossip, which isn't ideal when it is about me! He throws potatoes at me at work and smacks my head with a broom which is also really great (naaat). But he is a little brother type that needs looking after so I feed him goon and make him eggs and soldiers in the morning.

The Other Italians

This band of Italian boys speak so little English that I am not sure how they have survived so long in Australia. They wear baggy 90s jeans that dangle below their bums and always seem to be carrying overflowing pans of pasta around the backpackers. The one guy also always wears this beanie with flaps over the ears that has some sort of creature on it. The combo of the hat, the tufty facial hair and Italian-ness ALWAYS makes me think of Rizzo the Rat from the muppets.

Anyway, they are always cooking these almighty feasts in the kitchen and I have been so lucky to have a little sample here and there if I am loitering in the kitchen at the right time. This is just great except the one time I was tricked into eating some heart. HEART! Aaaaaaaah.

The Estonians

These guys are pretty ummm...weird. The one guy is a skinhead called Silver, he has these alien ice blue eyes and is always wearing starched 80s tennis shorts even though it is like 5 degrees. They arrived on a Saturday which is the big party night of the week and I totes recall them getting their creep on and coming into our room at 4am before I swiftly kicked them out.

Anyway, the Estonians and Italians have combined forces and are all hooking up with the cute gang of Asian girls. Not all too certain how they communicate but they all seems very happy.

The Scouser Brothers

These lads have the strongest Scouser accents I have ever heard! I have no idea what the FECK they are saying. They might as well be speaking Vietnamese.

Will and Grethe
These two are the most couple-ish non-couple ever. I was convinced they have been together for years when they have only been dating for a few short weeks. We have spent a great many evenings spinning yarns and drinking goon outside with them. Grethe is Swedish but has dyed brown hair (rebel). She is pretty and quite alternative with a bolt through her nose but she quoted Mean Girls the first time I met her so I knew we would get along alright.

Will is a Brit with a big variety of those cool caps with the visor bits that stick up and he is besties with the toy boy and big Tom.

The Toyboy
Why is it that as soon as you swear men off for a while that in that exact moment one strolls into the backpackers and starts chatting you up in the kitchen. I guess all great tales need a little love interest correct?  Well, mine has come in the form of an olive skinned, browned eyed, young *cough*, rather handsome, Colombian man. He speaks Spanish, obviously, which means he rolls all his r's, purring like a damn tomcat in my ear. So yep, pretty hard to resist.

He is really um affectionate and pretty pro-PDA which makes for a massive change from my last 2 boyfriends. It's a little disconcerting as I am really not used to it and it's a little strange/horrifying being the person to make everyone reach for a vom bag for a change.

I'm a little confused by what is happening but I think I must have been temporarily smacked with the 'mad game' stick because the boy even tried to kiss me at my work. Running on 3 hours of sleep with some seriously bloodshot eyes and wearing a hair net...um it's not really ideal for any sort of romance.

A little slice of Backpacker Life
I will definitely divulge a few stories but here is a little taster of what life has been like in the backpackers. In the last week, for example, we have had visits from the police, the fire department and an ambulance (some more than once).

There have been make ups, break ups, hook ups, punch ups, dance offs, drink offs, beat box battles, a few tears, some massive laughs and a generally large amount of scandal. WOW.

There are lots more friends and freaks to tell you about but not enough time today because I am off wine tasting!

More bants from the farmlands soon.

xx